A Twisted Up Frown, Disguised As A Smile

[acontrollist]

Rachel isn't one to make impulsive decisions. She usually takes as long as possible to think things through, weighing the pros and cons of each outcome.

She obviously didn't do that tonight, since she's standing in Sam Evan's doorway, a bottle of vodka in her hand.

Honestly, she doesn't know what else to do.  Ever since she hung up that picture that Sam drew of her a month ago, she and Bradley have been doing nothing but fighting (and having makeup sex, but that's neither here nor there). Tonight was the worst though.  There was screaming, name calling (whore was thrown both ways) and one of her favorite crystal vases is still sitting in 3 pieces on her kitchen counter. It probably didn't help matters that as soon as Bradley had left ("Where are you going?! We're not finished talking about this!" "Out. Don't wait up.") Rachel did the only thing she could think of, which was calling Sam, who'd told her to just come over.

She's not even sure how the vodka came into play, but getting drunk sounds really good right now.

Comments

[dontcrysammy.livejournal.com]

He feels helpless as he watches her stand, drying her face. He wants to comfort her but the last time that happened... bad things happened.

"Nice guys finish last," Sam says quietly. "It's why you're attracted to someone like Bradley and not me."

[acontrollist.livejournal.com]

"Don't be silly, Sam. Of course I'm attracted to you." She sighs, rubbing both hands over her stomach. "Just...none of this is fair."

[dontcrysammy.livejournal.com]

He watches her rub her stomach before he stands up and puts his palm over hers that's on her belly. It's probably too early in the pregnancy for much to have formed inside her womb but he hopes she appreciates the gesture.

"I know you're scared the baby is gonna have a dad who doesn't want them..." Assuming Bradley turned out to be the father. "But if it's any consolation, I'll love them like they're my own."

[acontrollist.livejournal.com]

She sniffles, leaning up and wrapping her arms around Sam's neck. "You're a good man, Sam. And...someday, someone is going to make you an amazing father the right way."

[dontcrysammy.livejournal.com]

Their night together had felt right to him. Even if they were drunk and she had a boyfriend at the time, something had still felt right about the way they'd connected. His arms come around her small frame.

"I don't think it matters how the baby is conceived... You still get a beautiful baby out of it and that's all that matters."

[acontrollist.livejournal.com]

It felt right to her too, but after that slip up she was trying to hold as tightly to her morals as she could. She was still trying to figure out how she'd complete this run of her show with her co-star probably telling everyone they knew that she was pregnant with a man's baby.

Honestly, she didn't know that for a fact and neither did he. But she was really, really hoping.

"I meant, I-..." She sighs. "I meant you'd meet a girl, fall in love, decide to have children and then spend 9 months preparing and being excited instead of wondering..."

[dontcrysammy.livejournal.com]

He can't say he's in love with her right now. He is very fond of her however, and if he spends the next nine months living with her... well, he won't be surprised if he finds himself in love with her by the time the baby is born, if not sooner. She's a very lovable person, at least in his opinion.

"Oh... Well, if there's one thing I've learned growing up it's that life doesn't go according to plan, so... Let's just take it one step at a time and see what happens."

[acontrollist.livejournal.com]

"That's all we can really do." She agrees, moving back once there's a knock at the door. "Did they give you a total on the phone?" She asks, crossing the room to where her purse sits on top of one of her suitcases.

[dontcrysammy.livejournal.com]

"Yeah, don't worry, I've got it." Sam's already at the door, opening it to the delivery guy and giving him money in exchange for their food. The smell of Chinese wafts into the apartment. "Smells good..." He doesn't realize how hungry he is until his stomach rumbles at the prospect of being filled with chicken chow mein.

[acontrollist.livejournal.com]

"But I promised..." She pouts a little when the delivery guy leaves, retaking her seat on the couch and folding her arms. "I'm paying you back. I hope you realize that."

[dontcrysammy.livejournal.com]

"Stop pouting, your face might stay that way," he teases her before setting the bag of food down on the coffee table. He grabs a bottle of beer from the fridge and thinks about asking her if she wants wine or something, but then he remembers the whole being pregnant thing... "Do you want a glass of water?"

[acontrollist.livejournal.com]

"You made me." She replies childishly, sticking her tongue out at him as he walks into the kitchen. "Yes please!" She calls out in response to the water, opening her food and settling back on the couch to eat. She'd been hungry before, but now that she can smell the food she's starving. "This baby is going to make me fat, I just know it." She mumbles, taking a bite of her food.

[dontcrysammy.livejournal.com]

"Aren't babies supposed to do that?" Sam returns with her glass of water, sitting back on the couch and opening his box of noodles. "Besides, you're eating for two now."

[acontrollist.livejournal.com]

"But I don't want to be fat...its not attractive nor is it conducive to a lifestyle as active as mine." More pouting. But she hasn't stopped eating yet.

[dontcrysammy.livejournal.com]

"Since you're so active, I'm sure you can lose the weight quickly after the baby's born." He picks up the noodles with some chopsticks. "And I think you're attractive enough to pull off some extra weight."

[acontrollist.livejournal.com]

She blushes, taking a few more bites. "I hope so...but thank you..."

"How are Stacey and Stevie?"

[dontcrysammy.livejournal.com]

"They're good. They're visiting next month..." The mention of his siblings made him think whether he should tell his family about his situation with Rachel. He chewed silently on his food as he thought about it.

[acontrollist.livejournal.com]

"That's good. Hopefully I'll have an apartment by then so it won't be so crowded here." The same thought occurs to her but she doesn't bring it up. Pushing him would only scare him away and right now he's all she's got.

[dontcrysammy.livejournal.com]

"Right... Of course you'll want your own apartment." Except he was kind of expecting her to stay with him until the baby is born, and then maybe if it's his keep living with him... But he's aware his apartment isn't the biggest. He doesn't even have a spare room for her so it's more practical if she finds her own place...

He shouldn't be getting all sad about her leaving when she hasn't gone yet. He brings his bottle of beer to his lips and takes a sip.

[acontrollist.livejournal.com]

"Well you'll eventually want your bed back, I'm sure...and towards the end of my pregnancy, space in the bed would become scarce..." And she can't saddle him with all of this...responsibility, at least until the baby is proven to be his. It wouldn't be fair.

[dontcrysammy.livejournal.com]

"Rach, you make it sound like you're gonna turn into an elephant." He's pretty sure pregnant women sleep with their partners in bed without any trouble... Not that he's Rachel's partner, of course. "I get why you'd want your own bed though... And if you'd just let me take the couch, you'd have your own space now."

[acontrollist.livejournal.com]

"I'm not kicking you out of your bed, Sam. It's bad enough that I'm clogging up your apartment and I am not going to keep inconveniencing you!"

[dontcrysammy.livejournal.com]

Sam will just swiftly back off the subject since she's already turning into a scary, angry pregnant lady. "Okay, okay, calm down..."

[acontrollist.livejournal.com]

She blushes, avoiding his eyes now and being really focused on her dinner. "I'm sorry. I don't mean to let my hormones get the best of me, I just-....I meant what I said. You're doing me a favor letting me stay here and I don't-...I can't keep asking for more..."

Stupid LJ being down... is it tuesday yet? I want me some White Chocolate :P

[dontcrysammy.livejournal.com]

"Remember when I was living in a motel back in high school?" Sam reminds her. "I was determined not to let anyone find out about it or let anyone help me out. As far as I was concerned, it was my problem to deal with and no one else's. And then Kurt and Quinn found out, wouldn't take no for an answer, did what they could for me... and it made things so much easier when I stopped letting my pride get in the way. So please, just let me be your friend and help you, and don't ever feel like you're hassling me."