A Twisted Up Frown, Disguised As A Smile

[acontrollist]

Rachel isn't one to make impulsive decisions. She usually takes as long as possible to think things through, weighing the pros and cons of each outcome.

She obviously didn't do that tonight, since she's standing in Sam Evan's doorway, a bottle of vodka in her hand.

Honestly, she doesn't know what else to do.  Ever since she hung up that picture that Sam drew of her a month ago, she and Bradley have been doing nothing but fighting (and having makeup sex, but that's neither here nor there). Tonight was the worst though.  There was screaming, name calling (whore was thrown both ways) and one of her favorite crystal vases is still sitting in 3 pieces on her kitchen counter. It probably didn't help matters that as soon as Bradley had left ("Where are you going?! We're not finished talking about this!" "Out. Don't wait up.") Rachel did the only thing she could think of, which was calling Sam, who'd told her to just come over.

She's not even sure how the vodka came into play, but getting drunk sounds really good right now.

Comments

Stupid LJ being down... is it tuesday yet? I want me some White Chocolate :P

[dontcrysammy.livejournal.com]

"Remember when I was living in a motel back in high school?" Sam reminds her. "I was determined not to let anyone find out about it or let anyone help me out. As far as I was concerned, it was my problem to deal with and no one else's. And then Kurt and Quinn found out, wouldn't take no for an answer, did what they could for me... and it made things so much easier when I stopped letting my pride get in the way. So please, just let me be your friend and help you, and don't ever feel like you're hassling me."

I really hope he didn't pick that.

[acontrollist.livejournal.com]

"That's different." She mumbles. "That's not the same thing. We were your friends and we wanted to help but we-...this-...what if it's not yours, Sam? The chances-..."

Me too.

[dontcrysammy.livejournal.com]

If it isn't his, there's every possibility that he'll be so disappointed he'll actually cry... Which is why he probably shouldn't get his hopes up.

"If it's not mine, I'm not gonna think I wasted nine months of my life looking out for you and the baby, if that's what you think." He feels like he's going around in circles with her and this conversation though and it makes him lose his appetite. "I'm going to bed," he announces, getting up from the couch and heading towards his bedroom. Or is their bedroom now? Either way, he goes to brush his teeth before bed.

Did you grab the parenting meme?

[acontrollist.livejournal.com]

"Okay." She lets the conversation drop, eyes still on her food as he stands to leave. She doesn't really want to eat but she forces herself to finish, knowing that not eating is bad for the baby.

But when she gets ready to go to bed later, she doesn't go into the bedroom. She falls asleep on the couch after she puts the leftovers in the fridge. She's tiny, so his couch actually has plenty of room for her to curl up and sniffle softly to herself until she falls asleep.

I lost the link D: But my brain couldn't seem to come up with a comment anyway, sorry :(

[dontcrysammy.livejournal.com]

Sam stays up waiting for Rachel, expecting her to come to bed as soon as she finishes her food. But she never comes and he goes to investigate, sighing when he finds her on the couch. That won't do at all.

Because she's so tiny, he easily scoops her up into his arms. He's had a lot of practice picking up his sleeping siblings and carrying them to bed without waking them, which is exactly what he does with Rachel, setting her down on the mattress. After tucking her under the covers, he climbs back into bed by her side.

Its cool :)

[acontrollist.livejournal.com]

She only stirs a little bit when he picks her up, but doesn't wake to protest, burying her face against his chest. When he climbs into bed on her other side, her body wastes no time seeking out his. She's a cuddler. She's always been a cuddler and she doesn't get to indulge much. She tucks her head against his shoulder, curling up beside him. "Mmm."

We WILL have parenting times though!

[dontcrysammy.livejournal.com]

Sam wonders if she's confusing him with Bradley and tries to pull away at first, but she's persistently snuggling up against him and in the end he gives up and humors her, draping an arm around her waist.

Yes!

[acontrollist.livejournal.com]

The fact that he cuddles her back kind of reinforces to her subconcious mind that this is not Bradley. He didn't like cuddling. She sleeps good for the first time since the night they slept together, curled close to him.

Her alarm going off in the living room wakes her at about 8:15 and she stirs, sitting up in bed. "Sam? We-...gotta go. Doctor."

[dontcrysammy.livejournal.com]

Good thing Rachel set an alarm since Sam completely forgot. And he really isn't good at waking up in the morning, which Rachel should know from the last time she slept over.

"Five more minutes," he groans sleepily into his pillow.

[acontrollist.livejournal.com]

She laughs, turning to lay her chin against his chest again. "Not 5 more minutes. We have to be in the Doctor's office in 45 minutes."

[dontcrysammy.livejournal.com]

He likes how she's still being snuggly with him. He was kind of expecting to wake up and have her be in denial about the cuddling. If he's too comfortable to move, it's entirely her fault. "How far away is it?"

[acontrollist.livejournal.com]

"10 minutes, I believe." She loves snuggles. Seriously. Last night is totally forgotten because Sam is the cuddliest ever. "That's 35 minutes for us to get ready."

[dontcrysammy.livejournal.com]

"I'm a dude," Sam reminds her. "I can get ready in five minutes." That's if he doesn't shower.

[acontrollist.livejournal.com]

She rolls her eyes, still laughing as she pushes off of him and heads into the living room to grab some clothes. 10 minutes later, the shower in his spare room starts to run.

[dontcrysammy.livejournal.com]

Meanwhile Sam ends up falling back asleep but wakes up again when he hears the shower running. He should probably have some coffee or something and finally gets out of bed to make a cup. Deciding he'll have a shower later when he gets back to the apartment, he puts on some clothes and waits until Rachel is ready to go.

[acontrollist.livejournal.com]

Rachel's towel drying her hair when she finally enters the kitchen, wearing a loose fitting top and some stockings, though she's barefoot otherwise. "oh, you're awake!" She smiles when she sees him, tying up her hair up and sitting down on the couch to pull her boots on. "That coffee smells wonderful."

[dontcrysammy.livejournal.com]

"You sound surprised," he says in response to him being awake. He's made her coffee too and crosses the room to hand her a cup. "Almost as good as Starbucks."

[acontrollist.livejournal.com]

She glances down at the cup, then gives him a sheepish smile. "Pregnant women can't have caffeine, Sam..." She leans up, kissing his cheek. "Thank you, though."

[dontcrysammy.livejournal.com]

"Oh... right." He cringes at himself. "Sorry... More coffee for me, I guess," he laughs a little.

[acontrollist.livejournal.com]

"It's okay. We'll stop and get breakfast after the doctor's appointment, yeah?" She grabs her purse, heading to the door. "You ready to go?"

[dontcrysammy.livejournal.com]

"Sounds good." He tips her coffee down the sink. "Just a sec..." He grabs all his essential belongings for the day like his phone and his wallet, and after putting on his sneakers he's all set. "Ready." Once they're both out the door, he shuts it behind them and locks it.

[acontrollist.livejournal.com]

After the appointment, Rachel suggests they go to a little diner down the street and she's picking at her pancakes when she says "Was that weird, for you?"

[dontcrysammy.livejournal.com]

"A little," Sam tells the truth since a couple of days ago he would have never have imagined he'd be in a doctor's office with Rachel, having a check up on a baby he might have possibly fathered. He picks at his own pancakes before glancing up at her from across the table. "Just gotta give it time, right?"

[acontrollist.livejournal.com]

"Right. I mean, there's no heartbeat or anything yet that we can hear. It was weird for me too..." She shrugs a little, taking a bite of her own pancakes.

[dontcrysammy.livejournal.com]

The lack of a heartbeat doesn't make any of it less real for Sam though, and he reaches across the table to touch her hand, the one that isn't putting a forkful of pancakes in her mouth. It's something he would have held back doing if she was still with Bradley, but now he's out of the picture... Maybe Sam can slowly start hinting at wanting something more with her.